Can’t Win For Losing

Oh, how my head aches as I write this.

I had big plans for the day, but they were sidelined for multiple “right now” needs. I decided to go with it. Besides the only thing I MUST do today has been stalled by YELLOW HIGHLIGHTER. Point is, I found myself at the grocery store because the cupboard was bare and I happened to be driving past. I needed gasoline too.

So I do my grocery shopping child-free. That NEVER happens. It was nice. I bought less junk and didn’t have to say “no” a single time. I am a bring-my-own-bags gal and for the first time ever they noticed that one was insulated and put all my cold stuff in it (it’s still hot in the desert). I didn’t even have to repack. YAY, lady sacker! The guy after me had a single jar of salsa. The sacker asked if he wanted a bag. “Yes,” he replied, “double it.” Asswipe. I had four bags, he should have quadrupled it. Such inspiration am I.

Then I went to get my gasoline. The tanks were being filled and I know that I don’t want all that stirred up crap in my tank. I also know that the light is on in the van signaling I have no gas and if I don’t use my coupon, it will expire. So I fill up. I fill up so much that I just pour it all over the ground. The little automatic lever, which I put on the first divit for a slow fill, didn’t click off. Gas on the ground, gas on the car, gas on my shoe.

Anyway, I’m an ecological disaster with a headache.

5 thoughts on “Can’t Win For Losing

  1. Anonymous says:

    Can you believe I’ve never had that happen with the gas? But I almost always just hold the handle myself, control freak that I am.

    My grocery store is selling reusable insulated bags. Pretty inexpensive really. And they have a big sign posted at each register asking customers to think about if the REALLY need to double bag.

    Speaking of ecological craziness — at work we just started ‘going green.’ We now use TP and paper towels made of recycled materials. I’m giddy with glee over this. But…they are still watering the grass at straight-up noon. It’s killing me.


  2. John says:

    The sooners hung another half hundred on the hapless huskies of Washington and moved up to No. 2 in the polls. so, that’s a win, iddn’t it?
    Yore daddy’s closed off the a.c. in two rooms but that doesn’t matter right now since it’s 73 in OKC, so it’s just windows open and Sinatra running in and out at will.
    And I played poker last night and your inheritance is $12 in the black as of today.
    love you honeybunch

  3. JoeFix says:

    After waiting 45 minutes in line for gas after the hurricane (actually a relatively short wait compared to locations around the city) I realized why the wait was so long (besides everyone filling up their pickup truck load of 5-gallon gas containers each)…the pump was pumping at a rate of less than a gallon per minute. Not sure of the reason behind that, but rest assured I still couldn’t visually keep up with the “cents” column of the display – even slow flow means fast dollars departing from my wallet. After waiting 15 minutes to dispense my 12.89 gallons, the nozzle overflowed. Of course, there’s nothing more “in your face” than walking around smelling like “eau d unleaded” when gas is in short supply.

  4. Rebecca Ballenger says:

    Koo Koo, this was my first time and the gas attendant was way put out to have to clean up the spill for me. “It’s really not that bad,” she said. I explained I had just used the reusable bags….

    Na, no kidding. Way to go J!

    Dad, that $12 will come in handy to purchase the sugary cereal box my bro plans to bury you in.

    Joe, I hadn’t taken into account the smell of money as a bonus scent.

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